to the sea

we took a drive down to the salton sea yesterday on a whim.  it's such an interesting place, and we only were able to spend a few hours by the visitors center.  there is so much more to see there, including boiling mud pits (which eliot is ecstatic about), that we will most certainly be back soon.  it has this abandoned feeling, not in a creepy way, but more like in a relaxed way.  like maybe it was never supposed to be as busy as it was in its heyday?  this place has been filling up and then drying out again for hundreds and hundreds of years.  it's hard to get in the way of cycles like that.  anyway, read more about it here.  and you'll probably see more of it here too.  i shot some 120 film, i hope it comes out!!

two gone by

somehow it's nearly march and we've had two birthdays come and go.  eliot turned 11 (seriously) at the end of january and we managed to keep six boys entertained with a parachute, some stomp rockets and a good old fashioned jump rope contest!  and then that arlo went and turned 7 at the beginning of february, how i'm not sure.  she wanted disneyland and swimming and really why wouldn't anyone want that???  
i know back in the day, i used to get a little sappy over here on birthdays, but it seems a little different now that they are big kids.  so big.  and so loud.  oh man.  somedays i can't even stand being in the same room with them.  and others i want nothing more than to lay in a giggling heap of them on the couch.  i guess that means they're growing up?  or maybe i am?  i'm not sure.  what i do know is that they are pretty great.  loud mouths and all.  i love my three monkeys.

2013

i didn't really make any resolutions this year.  ok, that's not entirely true, i'd like to learn how to back into a parking space.  but that's more like basic necessity, not a resolution, right?  mostly i'm just glad that 2013 is here.  the tail end of 2012 wasn't so hot for me.  actually it was downright terrible.  more than anything i was worried that the terrible was going to follow me right on into this year.  but it didn't, thank goodness.  because of that, this year seems so shiny and new with possibility.  i really think it's going to be a good one.  when i read this later, i'll need to remind myself that we've been having unseasonably warm days here and that we took advantage of it and spent our first beach day of 2013.  it was quiet and uncrowded, just the way we like it.  oh and blouses.  i'm going to try to buy more blouses.  maybe not blouses exactly, but shirts that are not tshirts.  you know?  because this year i'm hitting my, ahem, late 30's stride.  2013 people!!  what about you?

sunday

a quiet day at home 
laundry
left over pizza for lunch
playing
christmas lights
all of us together
happy and healthy
a blessing that i sometimes forget to count
but not today
love and peace to those families who are not whole

the lost year

I can't tell you how many times I asked Melissa, "are you sure that wasn't last year???" but it was a lot.  Each and every time, she calmly closed her eyes, shook her head and said "nope".  This is her secret weapon, the calm and the eye closing.  I need to work on this skill.  You might wonder how someone could go about losing a year, and I will tell you it's not only possible, it's inevitable when you spend that year working 70-90 hours a week.  I do not recommend this to you, please do not attempt it.  Especially if you don't have a partner that is a saint, and even then they will be frustrated with you quite a bit.  But I will tell you if you have a chunk of debt to pay off, a year like that will work wonders.  I digress.  Because what I really want to tell you about is Melissa.  I know you know her, because she makes beautiful things and has a beautiful family.  Sam and Paul included, they just don't like the camera so much because that's what boys do when they get older.  But that Melissa, she is something else.  Remember that secret weapon?  It really is amazing to me how she manages to take people for who they are, all they have going on, take it all in, process it in her own calm way, and then do or say just the right thing.  Whether that thing is reassurance, advice, action, or the hardest one for me, just letting things be.  Not to say she's a saint, she is Canadian after all (ha!), and she curses like a sailor (after the kids are in bed), and she used to wear overalls and combat boots.  So yeah, I love her.  A lot.  A lot a lot.  Thank you for letting me come visit, I will not lose another year, I swear.