i am

i had a revelation today. this may come as a surprise to you, but today i realized i am a photographer. what? i know. why today? let me back up a bit. remember last week how i was so excited to find out that my friend prentiss is a photographer? and how i talked his ear off about lights, and studio space, and all kinds of other nerdy photography things. well, as what usually happens when i start talking about cameras and whatnot, i get "the question". you know the question. everyone get's it. "oh! so are you a (fill in the blank)?". some lady overheard us talking and sure enough, she asked the question. and i hemmed and hawed like i usually do. oh, not really. well, yeah kind of. i do it on the side, i really like photography etc etc. she looked at me like i had a camera growing out of my forehead, and i somewhat awkwardly returned to my conversation with prentiss. we talked some more, and i said something about having been published in a polaroid book. see! he said, don't do that. don't do what, i said? don't answer the question like that, you are a photographer. oh, i said. i stewed on it for a while, and a few days later had another one of my reoccurring conversations with david, you know the "what am i even doing?" one. i get so worked up about defining myself or my style or my work or whatever that i forget one very important piece of the puzzle. nobody, and i mean nobody is defined by one single, solitary thing. i am a million things. i am a mother. i am a wife. i am an archaeologist. i am petite. i am sassy. i am a klutz. we all are a million things. to be defined by one thing would be almost nonhuman. not to mention boring. so where am i going with all of this? well, today this arrived. i opened it up, squealed a little, and then turned over my card and saw this.

can you read that? it says image copyright © by Hannah Huffman. that's right. it's me. it hit me like a ton of bricks. and if jenifer altman lived in kansas city, i would have run right over to her house, screamed in her ear, jumped in her lap, and given her the biggest hug ever. thank you jen so much for including me in your brain child. for asking me twice! for encouraging me when i was skeptical that i could do it. and of course, i have to thank david for giving me the kick in the pants i need when i get all wishy washy. last summer when john asked me if i wanted to have my first show, my head was spinning. what?? yes, but how?? and david ever so dryly says, stop freaking out and just do it. oh. ok. he's like my own personal tim gunn. so will i be the next annie leibovitz? no. i doubt it. will i take photographs for the rest of my life for fun? yes. will i take photographs for other people who want to pay me? hopefully. why? because i am a photographer. and a million other things.